`Monday, February 14, 2005;__
how stupid.
i cried! inside the MRT somemore! -alone-
aww i felt depressed. aint in the mood.
house packed with my father's frens.
and den my mum cooked lots of foods.
den i left my house at 1 plus and headed
to rowenna's hse to bai nian, with huimin,
weilin, teng, melson & yao guan. hais.
den her hse also got so many ppl. all her sis
frens. okay den nth much happened there
rather sians. den left her hse arnd 4 den
headed to westmall to meet jian jian cos
he wanna give me the valentine present.
is a bracelet. =X wordins on it somemore.
anw thx alot =X. hais when i meet him
i was alr not in the mood loh. dunnoe y.
den later meet meijin go buy the earings.
hais bought LOTS of earings =X erm teng
and mj spent lk $5 and i spent $10. =X
hais den went home aftr tt. didnt have
the mood to stay longer. sorri gals. =X
k den i took mrt back to Admiralty.
inside the MRT therr were so many couples.
=X k wasnt in the mood to see anything
at all but ... okay den dunnoe y when i
reached kranji den my tears jus rolled
down, followed by the memories.
and then i cud feel the pain inside of me.
no words cud ever decribe how i feel.
it jus some how hurts so much when the
moment i think of the past. it hurts
me deeply. i'm so emotional. i cried again
when i watch *huang zhu ge ge * jus now.
i'm so useless i know but i jus cant control.
i've cried thrice for today includin now.
i really dun wish to go sch tml but i cant.
i've missed lessons on fri and i cant afford
to miss anymore lessons . i cant.
but if i go sch tml how will i feel? how wud
i react? wud i still be able to hang a smiley
face ? wud i still be able to fake a smile?
or wud my tears roll down ? i seriously
hate to see all tt. if i cud i wud jus shut
myself in my room and cry out real loud!
i hope i wud acctually stop my heart beat
for jus tt 1 day. which is tomoro!
i'm such a coward ya i noe. i dun dare to
face the reality. cos is ever cruel.
the one i love aint here but the one i dont
love is jus so annoyin kip botherin me
whole day long. wads this? leave me alone
pls. i've already delete u from my contact
list pls dun bother me .
Happy valentines to all.
treasure wad u have now.
[[stop my heartbeat for jus 1 day.]]
[[tears]]
`_______LISTEN TO MY HEART_______;__ 2:16 PM;__
